Sooo, now what?

2/22/14

Our appointment is booked for March 14th!!! So...  what the hell do I do until then........

It took less than 24 hours for me to start acquiring the necessary reading material for our new adventure. I ordered What to Expect.... online, a book on nutrition,  a "Girlfriends" guide to pregnancy, what the doctor won't tell you but your girlfriends will (happens to be my favorite right now) and a medical book regarding labor and child birth.

I'm already freaked out.

It only took a mere chapter in the nutrition book to read what would happen or not happen to our growing baby if I didn't get certain nutrients. It's horrifying. If it wasn't for the fact that I have been taking pre natal vitamins for some time (and I'm healthy overall) I'd probably start faking a major event/illness/heart attack, anything that would throw me in the hands of a care taker who would assure me that everything is and will be ok. I get why they have to tell you the bad stuff but man alive, it isn't helping my over working/paranoid brain.

Last night Joe and I decided to have a night out which pre-prego meant pre dinner drinks, dinner, post dinner drinks then home some time after midnight. Last night was straight to dinner for our reservation at 7:30 (thankfully I napped before hand), dinner which took more time than expected, home by 10:00pm and in bed snoring by 10:30pm.

It was nice to actually get out. What I thought were the winter blahs lately and my incessant need to lay down and nap apparently has nothing to do with winter and everything to do with the progesterone levels rising in my body (see? reading already). The only going out that has appealed to me lately was either work or a trip to Wegmans if we needed. Now I know why.

Over the course of dinner, the baby managed to dominate most of conversation. We discussed names.

Joe: "What do you think of the name Adolf?"
Me: "Absolutely not."
Joe: "Really? Why not?" (With a shit grin on his face)
Me: "I do not have enough time this evening to give you all the reasons why that is not happening." (Look of death to Joe)

We discussed birthing methods:

Me: (Trying to not laugh while I say this with the most serious inquisitive look I could muster) "Hey honey, what do you think about me having a water birth, in a kiddie pool, in the middle of the family room and we invite all our friends and family over?"
Joe: (Massive look of disgust) "Are you serious?"
Me: "Not even a little, but your facial expression was worth asking."

We discussed Lamaze classes:

Me: "You realize that you are in fact going with me to these?"
Joe: "Can't I find a sub to do that?" (shit grin on his face)
Me: "I'm not asking you. I'm telling you. I'm the mother of your child (A phrase I feel I will be using often)."

We discussed labor and the big event:

Me: "Do you see yourself as the cutting the cord kind of Dad?"
Joe: "I think I'll probably stay by your head." (With a look of trepidation)
Me: "Do you think you would pass out?"
Joe: "Yeah. Yeah I do."

We discussed babies in general:

Joe: "I'm scared. I've never held a baby before."
Me: "Seriously??? How have you never held a baby before." (Seriously, there's TONS of children in his family/or friends children).

Joe promised he would help with diapers. I vowed (with both fingers crossed) to be one of those fabulous pregnant women who managed to still dress up here and there (obviously we'll see) but still kept it cozy in sweats at home. We promised each other to try to be the best parents we could be but to also be a team. I made him promise to not take me seriously when I am overwhelmed and over emotional at times and to be my rock. He convinced me that we should find out the gender when we can.

It's been a matter of 2 days with this knowledge and I already feel like a different person. A better person to be honest. Shifting priorities, being consumed with the idea of being a mother and the million things I want to do (baby room, crafts, how we announce to the family, etc) that the trivial stuff I mentally hoarded just seemed to dissipate. It almost doesn't seem real. If it's not, please don't pinch me awake.

♥